6 Reasons Your Partner Needs a Doula – Even If They Don’t Realize It Yet

So, your estimated due date is getting closer and you are starting to get nervous. There are several things about your labor and birth experience that you truly want to happen, but you aren’t sure what to do to ensure that they happen. You talk to someone from your parents group, read something on social media or hear from a dear friend that they hired a Doula, so you do some research. You realize you want a Doula too! So now…how do you get your partner on board?  We’ve put together a list to help – 6 reasons your partner needs a doula.

You have decided that you truly want a Doula for your birth but your partner is worried that its a waste of money, or they worry that they will be pushed aside and not be able to be the main support person. Here are some reasons to share with them that will help them understand how valuable having a Doula is to both you and them!

1. Hiring a Doula will allow your partner to not feel so stressed to remember everything from every class you took during your pregnancy!

You remember… All of those classes to prepare yourself for your little one. All of that information that you were given! It can be overwhelming! Having a Doula at your labor and birth makes the stress of having to remember everything dissipate! Your partner can truly enjoy being your support person because they have someone there to help guide them to help you! Its a win-win!

2. Nurses and Doctors come and go, but a Doula is a constant presence. 

Both doctors and nurses have other patients and they also have their own schedule. Shifts change and there is charting that needs to be done so they will not be able to remain by your bedside the entire time. In addition, there are some nurses and doctors that aren’t well versed in comfort measures, position changes and the like. Would you rather have someone that is by your side through your labor and birth that is there solely to enhance your birth experience or would you rather have nurses and doctors that are in and out all of the time?

3. Everyone has to use the restroom and eat eventually! 

Even the human body has its needs and limits! There will be a time that your partner has to use the restroom or needs to nourish and hydrate but feels bad for leaving your side, so they suffer and compromise their own health and safety in the process. With a Doula present, your partner can leave to go and do those things without feeling as though they have abandoned you. That way they can be in tip top shape in order to continue to be your main support person. Your partner isn’t going to be what you need them to be if they can’t take moments to take care of themselves.

4. When everything feels like chaos; you have your Doula there to let you know that things “are normal” or to tell you “what to expect next”. 

Sometimes labor can feel intense and may get a bit overwhelming. Having a constant support person that is educated and well versed in all things childbirth will help put your mind at ease. You won’t need to worry about what’s “normal” and what’s not or what to expect next so you can emotionally or physically prepare. An educated Doula will share all of that with you! They are there to be your childbirth guide and confidant. They are there to assure you what’s happening is “ok” and to educate you on what’s to come so that your partner can feel more confident and less nervous. A more confident partner equals a more confident laboring person and that leads to a positive birth experience for everyone involved!

5. A Doula is there to offer encouraging words and guidance to both of you.

When you hire a Doula that Doula is there for both you and your partner. An experienced Doula is able to guide, support, encourage and empower both you and your partner simultaneously. That way when you look back and the birth experience, you both will smile and view the birth experience as a positive one!

6. Your Doula is just a text/phone call/email away for each of you. 

Support during your labor and birth is important but the support leading up to your special day is equally important. Your Doula will be a sounding board for both you and your partner. They will talk with both of you about your worries, concerns and fears as well as wishes and desires. Having an educated support person to be there for you both as your impending “birth” day approaches will help you both to feel ready and educated for your big day! Feeling educated, supported and validated will only lead to a more positive birthing experience for both of you!

Having a Doula can assist with these things and so may more during your pregnancy, birth and postpartum so that when you both look back at your entire experience you both feel loved, supported and empowered. Doulas are there to help enhance the birth experience and make it as close to your ideal birth experience as they possibly can. They are there to help and never hinder the bond that you and your partner have.

So take some time, interview several and find the best fit for your both. Listen to your intuition and it will never steer you wrong. Then you both can have a positive and amazing birth experience that you can reminisce on for years to come.  If you have any questions, please contact us here.

Plus Size Friendly Doula At Your Service

First let me start off by saying, you CAN BIRTH VAGINALLY AND NATURAL AND BE PLUS SIZE! There are many OB Practices that may try to veer you away from birthing naturally but your body is fully capable! I am a plus size friendly Doula and here to let you know that I am on your side! I am here and I have the education and experience to help plus size moms labor and birth their way! So lets dive in!

There are three very important things to remember as a plus size pregnant person!

  1. Choose a Plus Size Friendly Provider! In order for you to be supported with your birth choices and to be supported during your labor and birth it is imperative that you choose a plus size friendly provider. Not all OB’s are created equal and making sure that you are supported in all aspects of your pregnancy and birth can make or break your birth experience. Do you research, ask questions, interview potential OB practices! Remember, you are bringing your business to them! They need to impress you, not the other way around.
  2. Educate yourself! An educated laboring person is an EMPOWERED laboring person! The more educated you are the more you are able to make informed decisions instead of decisions made out of fear. Its not enough to know what the options are, but you also need to educate yourself on the pros and cons of each option. This is a huge moment in your life and going into it educated and empowered will make you remember your labor and birth experience is such a more positive and uplifting way! You deserve a positive birth experience and educating yourself is a great way to help you achieve that.
  3. Hire A Doula! It is important for you to have a supportive labor and birth support team. This includes your medical practice, hospital, nurse, family members that would be present (including a partner if this applies) and a Doula. Having a Doula there to help you articulate your wishes, empower and uplift you and other members of your birth team and help give you unbiased information should decisions need to be made is so so important! Those who receive continuous support during labor by a trained birth Doula are: 28% less likely to have a cesarean section, 31% less likely to use synthetic Oxycontin to speed up labor, 9% less likely to use pain medication and are 34% less likely to rate their childbirth experience negatively. But don’t just hire any Doula. Hire a Doula that has experience with caring for Plus Size Laboring People. There are certain laboring positions that Plus Size Friendly Birth Doulas know and there are also mechanics of the Plus Size Body that Plus Size Friendly Doulas are aware of and well versed in! It is a proven fact that Plus Size Laboring People are at a higher risk for having a Cesarean Section. So by hiring a Plus Size Friendly Doula, you are increasing your chances of having a vaginal birth! Here is a link to find a Plus Size Doula in your area.

Please know that you can equip yourself with all of the knowledge and resources to increase your chances of having a vaginal birth! Its within your power! You just need to recognize that you do have the power and you make the choices! Align yourself with a positive pregnancy and birth team and you will be one step closer to having a healthy vaginal birth! Birth your way!

What To Pack For The Hospital/Birth Center

Labor & Birth Bag

  • Picture ID, Insurance Card and Hospital Paperwork
  • Your Birth Plan (at least 2 copies)
  • *Eyeglasses/Contacts & Solution
  • Bathrobe
  • Slippers
  • 2-3 Pairs Socks with grips
  • Whatever Helps Relax You (Music, Pillows, Electric Candles, Oils, etc…)
  • Heating Pad
  • Fan
  • *Birthing Clothes/Gown
  • Jog Bras/Bathing Suit Tops (If you plan to labor in the water)
  • Lip Balm
  • Headband and/or Ponytail Holder
  • Hard Candies/Peppermints
  • Flip Flops
  • Extension cord for electronic devices
  • *Essential Oils
  • *Essential Oil Diffuser (If at Hospital)

For You & Partner

  • Snacks/Mints/Gum
  • *Medications
  • Toiletries
  • Something to Read and/or Watch
  • Pillows (Ones you don’t mind getting a bit messy)
  • Cellphone Chargers

For Your Partner

  • Camera (with Charger, Memory Card, Batteries and/or Charger)
  • Change of Clothes & Undergarments (Bathing Suit if you want to get in the water with mom)
  • Money (or Credit Card)

Hospital Bag For You

  • Nursing Bras and Pads
  • 2-3 Changes of Roomy/Comfortable Clothes
  • Pillows

Hospital Bag for Partner

  • 2-3 Changes of Clothes
  • Undergarments
  • Snacks
  • Comfortable Pillows

What To Bring For Baby

  • Installed Car Seat
  • Going Home Outfit
  • 1-2 Easy Outfits (t-shirts that snap in the front)
  • Extra Blanket (For The Way Home If It’s Chilly)
  • *A Thick Hat (If It Is A Colder Season)
  • 1-2 Pairs of Socks
  • Nail file

What to bring/prepare for siblings

  • Snacks
  • 2-3 changes of clothes
  • Comfort Items (blanket, stuffed animal, etc…)
  • Color Books & Coloring Utensils
  • Reading Books
  • DVD Player/Laptop to watch movies & Chargers
  • Toiletries (If planning on spending the night)
  • Puzzles/Small Games (without many pieces)
  • Pillow
  • Slippers